There's a dance, it's a rhythm, and you have to know the music.
If you don't, baby, you end up lying on your back, or your face. Somewhere in the prone position, anyway.
Don't be too needy, too clingy, too desperate to be with someone. If you are, it'll never happen.
Play it cool, be uninterested, and sometimes even a little cocky/jerky/bitchy/whatever. Don't always say the right thing. When you walk away they'll be fuming, but they'll be thinking about you, and maybe what you said. Then come back, laugh, tease them a little, and you'll have them in your hand. You'll have taken them through the deepest lows to the highest highs. You're their new king of the world.
If they're having a bad day, don't console them. See who they can be and take them there. No one wants to be miserable, so don't enable them. When you're excited to see someone, hang back. You don't want them to know you're excited. Yeah, they're special, but not THAT special.
Walk into the store, the club, the social center like you own the place. Know the owner's first name. Buy the bartender/bouncer a drink. Ask the waitress about her day as if you already know the answer, you're just challenging her a little to come alive.
Find the next adventure. Wear chainmail, around your body or around your heart. Go find yourself in the forest or jumping out of a plane or from a bungee cord. Whatever it is, do something, something you're afraid of, something you've never done before, just because you're alive today and tomorrow . . . well, we won't talk about that.
3 comments:
This reminds me of when I was dating and why I was so bad at it. Why do people have to live for the game? What happened to truth?
I think because on some level we get together with people because of the way they make us feel (emotional tension creates attraction), or who we see ourselves as when we're with them (smarter, sexier, desirable, adventurous, or they confirm a low perception of ourselves).
Truth in dating? Little doses. Jack Nicholson's right, "We can't handle the truth."
Well, even when I was willing to play, (pre falling in love) I never understood the rules. I am a horrible flirt; I just speak my mind and joke with people, but the flirt thing was impossible for me. Then there were other rules about when to have sex, when to call, all that sort of thing--my husband yesterday told me that I am like a prickly fruit--I have spines to ward off people; I am also honest and most men can't handle that. The more I look at the rules of dating, the more I accept natural selection as the only needed format for human interaction.
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